Take a Deep Breath
Today it was 54 degrees F, in January, in OHIO! What world am I living in? Last I checked it was still winter and I was told there would be plenty of snow this year! When it is this nice outside, it is hard to believe that just last Saturday it was in the single digits with subzero wind chill. Crazy weather days here in Ohio.
Speaking of last Saturday, holy cow, that was an interesting morning! So a little back story, I have been studying for a section of the CPA exam since mid-September and was scheduled to take that section of the exam last Saturday. I was trying to approach this exam with a calm approach and giving myself an hour to wake up and eat breakfast before I left the house. Well, apparently my subconscious had a different plan. I woke up from a nightmare and looked at my watch and realized it was only 3am, so after taking a moment to calm myself down and try and put that dream out of my mind, I was able to fall back to sleep and promptly fell right back into the nightmare =(. The next time I was able to wake up from the nightmare it was still only 5am, but I was planning on getting up at 6:15. As I laid there I realized that going back to sleep would probably mean extending my nightmare or I would run the risk of waking up really groggy. At that point I made the decision to go ahead and get up, read for an hour, eat breakfast, and watch the morning news. Finally, 7:20 rolls around, I kiss my husband, and I leave to go take this 4-hour exam.
I’m almost at my car when I hit a patch of ice and just barely missed falling directly on my behind. Once I’m in my car though, everything is calm, the car heats up, and I’ve got the radio turned to an alternative rock station. I get on the highway and I’m about 10 minutes from the testing site when I see a car coming up from behind and as they are passing in the lane to my left I realize two things: 1) they are on their phone and 2) they are really close to my car. In the next moment, they start to actively swerve into my lane (like they are switching lanes) without looking up from their phone! I slam on my brakes, thank goodness no one else was on the road, and lay on my horn. They do the typical quick swerve back into their lane, that people do when they finally look up and realize they’ve veered off course, and then speed off.
At this point I’m sweating all over and my heart is racing as I realize how close I just came to having my car annihilated. The problem is I can’t freak out because I still had to take my exam. When I arrived, I took a few minutes in my car to calm down my racing heart. When I was calm again I went in and started taking the test. The problem was that I forgot there was a new exam structure that broke up part of the exam that use to be one section into three. I started the exam and just focused on trying to manage my time as well as possible. I’m boogieing through the exam and then I realize I seriously needed at least another few hours in reality, but I only had 40 minutes! AHHH! In that moment, I had two thoughts as to what to do, put my head down and cry or to just get up and walk out of the room. I felt so defeated in that moment and I seriously got in my head.
Looking at that screen with two horrible options in my head, I took a deep breath and looked at my hands. Since I couldn’t see myself in that moment, I had to make do with just looking at my hands as a way to talk to myself. Looking at my hands I started talking to myself in my head and said that I studied for months and I prepared myself for this exam so I can tackle the questions I get through and answer them to the best of my abilities. So I took a really, really deep breath and dove into that last section of the exam.
Walking back to my car I started to think over my morning. It felt like maybe the universe was giving me signs that I should not take the exam, you know because of the nightmares, almost being in a serious accident, and then realizing I forgot the new exam format. However, I think maybe these were all signs were ways to get my mind off of my pre-exam jitters so I would be thinking about these events instead of the fact that I was so nervous.
Now I get to wait a month before I learn the outcome of the exam, woo!
Try and look at the signs the universe is giving you and really think about them and not just for the face value of the sign. There are times when it seems like the world is just against you, so flip perspective. Is it that the world is against you or more that you’ve been taking steps to sabotage your own happiness? The next time it seems that the world or someone is out to get you don’t react in the instant, instead make the effort to smile and walk away. I still struggle with this sometimes, however, I still make a conscious effort, especially when it is someone being unkind, to smile kindly and walk away.
When you can't brush it off, be like my John cat, curl up, get comfy, and take a snooze! If you like this post please like, comment, and share!